Number Three contacted me in the flurry of activity that started 2011 for me on a busy dating foot! He had a very ‘flowery’ profile: talking about all the exotic adventures he had been on and remarking that he was still ready for more. We wrote a bit, talked on the phone and set up a date at a (wait for it!) coffee shop one evening after work. He had a very unusual job history–including a stint as a professional gambler–not someone you come across every day.
I was telling my friend J about this date I was about to go on and how unusual his background was when she said “Is his name xxxx?” And it was. My date was her daughter’s best friend’s dad. How weird is that? J knew his wife and all his history, some that I’m sure he may have left out when telling me his background! Now I was faced with a dilemma–do I still go out with him? Do I tell him I know J? I really didn’t know what to do and the date was approaching fast!
I finally decided (after talking to a few friends) to go on the date and not say anything. So I went and it was pretty uneventful. Nice man, zero chemistry, no second date–I had decided, if there was a second date, to tell him about J at that point. With no second date, the point was moot–but it really drove home what a small dating universe there really is. I have to say, whenever I meet a divorced woman these days, I wonder if I have ever dated her husband! There really are not that many men to go around and you are bound to come across guys who are somehow connected to your friends (you know, six degrees of separation). So beware, cause the same thing could be happening to you!
Lessons learned:
1. Everyone who is divorced is someone’s ex..That could get awkward.