About 3 months after my first date, I was feeling strong/crazy/bored enough to try again–so I signed back up for Match and I was full-throttle back in the game of looking at people, having them look at me, sending e-mails (never answered), receiving e-mails (most not wanting to answer–but I always try to) and generally getting sucked back into the vortex..but this time I was ready (or at least, readier!)
I ended up with a close-together string of dates in early Jan–for some reason (and this happened for K as well), my match dates seem to come in bunches–I have between 2-5 pretty close together and then none for some time. This date started a string of four with number 2 up first. Number 2 was a very nice man. He was very new to this process, so I was the one to help him figure his way through it (imagine that!) I think I contacted him, we wrote a bit and arranged to meet for a coffee date (a place I would also visit again with at least 1 other date). It was pleasant, it was nice, it just wasn’t anything special. We both left the coffee wondering where to go from here–do we go out again and see if something happens? Do we let it go? He actually texted me and asked if I thought we should go out again–was I feeling anything?
It really was a crapshoot–He seemed like a nice, normal, stable man but there were no sparks at all and I really didn’t see them coming. The deciding factor for me was his love for golf and my relative disinterest toward it. He loved golf–playing golf, watching golf, taking golf vacations–it really was a passion in his life that I just did not share. Personally, I’d rather watch grass grow than watch golf on tv. It’s just too slow paced to catch my interest. I told him while he seemed like a very nice man, I felt he needed to find a lady who shared his passion for golf to have a successful match and we each moved on. If I had a single friend who was into golf, I would have passed him along in a heartbeat. He was a good one, he just wasn’t my good one…
Lessons learned:
1. Pay attention to their passions (and there is a difference between passion and interest) and if you don’t share it, it may not work out.
2. Sometimes it pains you to pass on someone who you think could be a really good guy–he just may not be right for you.